Dissociation Dayhab. com

Feeling Isolated - It's common for people who have dissociations to systematically isolate themselves from other external relationships. When we find ourselves in situations where we are subjected to abuse or unfair treatment, it is an instinctive reaction to reach out to others for help. If this help arrives on time and in an effective way, the abuse victim will feel encouraged to repeat the action the next time abuse occurs. However, if the response to a cry for help is misguided or untimely, the abuse victim may feel humiliated or confused and be discouraged from seeking help in the future. Because people who suffer from a dissociated personality  do not always fit the mould of typical human behaviour or thinking, the kind of "common sense" advice which is often given out can be counter-productive or dangerous.  hopeful counter-productive advice: She'll probably just grow out of it - they all do. He seems to have really turned things around lately. I know you g...

Fear locked the doors of my Child Withins Hiding place.Fear is the process that  triggers a strong physical response in our childhoods when confronted by a threat. Fear produces the adrenaline that prepares us for the classic "fight or flight" response to threatening situations. When we fear, we anticipate the possibility that something bad might happen soon. Our bodies shut down all long or non-critical functions as we prepare for immediate physical action. Our digestive systems shut down and expel unnecessary waste. Our immune systems and growth systems are put on a lower priority as we prepare to deal with sudden, immediate threats. Our heart beat and breathing quickens to provide increased oxygen to our muscles. Our senses heighten and our peripheral long range thoughts are relegated. Fear is a survival instinct that preserved some of our ancestors in moments of extreme danger. So fear can be a good thing. However, prolonged fear - also known as stress or anxiety, is ...

The Ten Stages is the only program that guarantees three outcomes...Grief..Pain ...Suffering. Also we accept the 5 Stages of Grief - Denial, Bargaining, Anger, Depression and Acceptance - these were first introduced by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross to describe a process which of us go through when dealing with a significant tragedy or loss.Remember we are recovering a relationship with our child within who has been betrayed and abandoned over many years sometimes a whole lifetime. The 5 Stages of Grief are: Denial Bargaining Anger Depression Acceptance Most of us go through our own version of the 5 stages of dissociated grief as we come to terms with the reality that we are dealing with our child within who suffers from a significant abuse and abandonment issues and whose childhood personality is deeply disordered, perfect but disordered brings long term struggles and difficult choices that we have now to face. In a way, we face a death - death of the dream of coming from a "normal...

Going it Alone within the ten stages/Taking Time Out for our child within. WE individuals who has spent years in a world where chaos is normal and there has been a dominant destructive or abusive personality in our life, the vacancy that is left once the relationship ends can be terrifying. Sometimes people feel a sense of panic and ask themselves questions like: What if nobody wants me? What if there's something wrong with me? What if I'm getting too old and it's getting too late? Why can't I find a normal relationship? What if getting hurt and being abused are really just normal? Being unsure about ourselves sometimes causes us to make mistakes when we hook up with someone else. We either do it too fast or we hook up with someone who isn't good for us. We need a time of grief Grief is a normal, response to loss that is normal, healthy  going through our Grief Cycle usually does not all come out at once or in just one way. The 5 Stages of Grief - The 5 Stages of ...

INTULEXIA is an intuitive technique of writing down whatever thoughts and feelings come to mind on a topic without taking a break, stopping to think or slowing down to correct spelling & punctuation.  "Intulexia Penning" has been developed by the Program - a taught course that offers contact with their child within who are grieving that loss and attempting to release the child into its own freedom. In INTULEXIA, we take a blank notebook or sheets of paper and writes about a topic or answers questions about a topic. The key in INTULEXIA penning is to write as much as you possibly can in a 30-45 minute window without taking your pen away from the page or stopping to reflect, think or analyse what you have written. Spelling, grammar, accuracy or appropriateness are all considered secondary. Just writing our thoughts down as fast as they come flooding in is the key. Confidentiality is crucial in PENNING. What you are writing is for your eyes only. You may later decide to sh...

Dissociation Definition:Dissociation- is used to describe a mental departure from reality. When Feelings Create Facts: Feelings are just that... Feelings, and may have no basis in fact at all... they are just feelings. - Child Within recognition We who dissociate sometimes believe feelings over facts. What we feel at a particular time becomes reality for us. As our moods change, we may rearrange or rewrite facts to make us more consistent with the way we feel. When confronted with “hard evidence” which contradicts the way we instinctively feel about something, we feel a sense of discomfort. However, if the information is compelling enough, most of us will learn to adjust our opinions or our feelings in order to maintain a consistent world view. We who disassociate however, are able to reject or modify “hard evidence” if it does not support the way we feel or believe the world to be. Dissociation goes beyond common mental errors, fantasy or self-indulgent denial. It is a pervasive pat...

Truth,Trust and Consent & Abuse Amnesia Definition: Abuse Amnesia - Abuse Amnesia is a form of suppression where an abuse victim has trouble remembering episodes where their boundaries have been violated.The Program has the ten stages to show solutions Description: Abuse Amnesia is a strange occurrence which is common among us who have been abused. When a abused person is interviewed or asked about how they are treated by the abusive person they are close to, they will often generalise a positive response. This positive response could be interepreted as denial, but it is also likely that the abuse victim just doesn't remember all the things they have been through. Abuse amnesia is a natural outcome of Confirmation Bias, where information which contradicts what a person wants to believe is neglected or forgotten quickly and information which confirms a belief is amplified and paid attention to. Abuse amnesia is common in situations where a person is still invested in the succe...

I behave destructively toward myself and others? I behave destructively toward myself and others?

Our courses consist of 8 or 9 weekly classes of program practices. You will be supported in sharing experience of, and discussing these, within the student group. Daily home practice is as important a part of the course as the weekly classes.You will be asked to commit to 45-60 minutes daily, six days a week, between each class. To benefit, you need to be able to commit both to coming to all the classes (including orientation session and practice day where applicable) as well as the daily home practice. This requires a strong commitment on your part to work through a gentle but rigorous daily discipline of meditation and other awareness exercises. Our Program courses help develop skills in listening – to self and others. They help manage everyday ups and downs, giving a fuller experience of life, as well as developing self-compassion. They offer skills to work more effectively with anxiety, depression, stress, chronic illness and pain, addictive behaviours, disrupted sleep, and...

When we recover from our traumatic history, our child within begins to interface with truth. With truth as our guide, we can do the real work of life which is to evolve consciousness to the next level of understanding. When we experience this true purpose, we experience an abiding faith in the goodness of life and our role in it. No matter the cruelty and confusion of the world around us, our life takes on a new meaning that inspires hope in ourselves and others for a new future.

It is not just victims of war, sexual abuse and other brutality who carry trauma—we all do. We are all traumatised due to childhood misfortune and collective ancestral insanity.

If you don't know by now, we are all about ACTION in The Program. ACTION! ACTION is where the juice of life is. That means - DOING SOMETHING. Saying "I love you", or committing to saying no, or exercising and eating right, adding more value to the world, getting off your butt and actually doing SOMETHING! ACTION is the bridge between dreams and reality. I have talked about change happening slowly. It does. The key is in the action. The crazy thing is that sometimes the only action we can take is the choice to not take action. Sometimes we have a waiting period. A time where we are supposed to be confused, we are supposed to incubate. And other times when we are supposed to work our butts off. The clue is to tune in and listen to our intuitive voice. What's being whispered to you in your meditations and what are you intuitively feeling about what is next? So many stagers block their own natural intuition because they are afraid. And they don't take action. They d...

Dissociation is a primary sickness, making us into very sick society. Forcing our minds to shear lose from our ability to see and discern, to evaluate and decide in this way does great damage to our ability to think coherently. It has, over time, left us at the mercy of the most obvious propaganda and lies. It makes us easy marks for demagogues and corrupt politics that would defraud us of all we have. “In an insane society, a sane man must appear insane.” That’s a quote from Mr Spock of Star Trek fame. Unfortunately for us, this is one time when science fiction speaks truth. Going against the dissociative flow will make you the target of those who have an interest in the way things are. This is nothing new for true followers of the carpenter, buddha , Einstein, Leonardo etc . We live in this world, but we do not follow it. We are part of this time and of this world. But we are not just that. We are also part of the child hidden within and while we live in this time, this epoch, we...

If we're looking for truly Loving Kindfulness, it is very difficult to be in a relationship with someone who isn't on the path to this form of recovery. We don't have to love ourselves perfectly to find real freedom, but we have to be on the path towards Loving Kindfulness. This also means that whomever we choose to be in a personal relationship with should be on that same path, too. There will be a perfect moment where we recover ourselves and then we can be in a relationship with ourself. It's a constant process of discovery with no end. But for a recovery to thrive and for intimacy with ourselves to emerge, we must be dedicated to growth; otherwise, we will hit a wall. A huge revelation for me recently has been that nobody, including myself, is perfect. It sounds obvious when I write it, but for many years I would meet people and project this expectation of perfection on to them.Whilst being attracted to dysfunction and I would get mad, angry and hurt when they ...

First is The Ten Stages then THE PROGRAM: Practicing loving-Kindfulness doesn’t mean we are a pushover. In fact, many times the loving-kindfullness action to do is to set our boundaries. As with everything we talk about here at the program, the key is balance. Too many boundaries and you close off; no boundaries and you lose yourself. We have to learn a valuable lesson: the boundaries of loving-kindfulness. One of the most challenging lessons we had to learn was the lesson of giving TOO MUCH away to others without regard for ourselves. This was a painful and crippling lesson for us to learn emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. We were bankrupt across the board. It was ironic because we were promoting a message of self-love, but didn’t have any for ourselves. Of course it is in giving that we receive, but that starts with ourselves. If we are not full of program power and authority of the child within, we will have nothing to give away.  We learned that bound...

The Program we returned with from Spain was not the one we left England with. Imagine setting the intention to create primary relationships in our lives that support and encourage us to live in our power and authority – CONSCIOUSLY. I think this has always been an unconscious desire of mine, but those words hold a lot of power in our program. Many of us have attempted to bond over our pain and shame getting angry or jealous when the other people start to step into their own power. Have you done that? I know I have… many times over many years in self-help groups. When we bond over our shame only, eventually it feels like we are walking on eggshells in all our relationships. If we feel this way, then we can safely say we have not bonded over our programs power and thus have not attracted any relationships that supports and encourages us to live within our power. The flip side of this desire is that we must also celebrate, support and encourage others to live in his or her power. And ...

Kindfulness comes through our child within. The perfect conduit for kindfulness is an honest person, pure of heart, healed of trauma. For kindfulness to come through us without distortion, we must not be barricaded by defences or poisoned by manipulation and distortion from the past. We must become a clear vessel.Learning to communicate through Intulexia and cleared of our emotional baggage If we are living not from our child within but from a defended, distorted reality we will fail to appreciate loving-kindfulness truthfully. If, in childhood, we have hidden our child deep within from the crippling clutches of our parents and a world that would crush us and we have not healed this, our adult expressions of love will be distorted. Until our child within is redeemed, our loving kindfulness will be filtered through our shadow self’s murky memories of terror and betrayal and will always have a hidden agenda: a secret, unconscious need for rescue, and when that fails our revenge. ...

THE PROGRAM RECOVERY: that overused and often distorted word, is in the terms of the program is the dissolution of the unconscious. When repressed traumatic memories and events are acknowledged, felt, grieved, and freed, we become RECOVERED. Our child withins channel of consciousness becomes clear so that our truth can flow through us. We’ve all have had moments of recovery. With unusual clarity, we see our truth. The clouds part—and we say ‘aha’! We are at one with all things. Truth is no longer distorted through the filter of the disturbances of our past or the biases of our family and culture. Truth is revealed, clear as a bell, at least for a moment. But sustaining this recovered state is a difficult task. To do so, we must do some work. We are not suggesting that the solution requires endless tedious hours of repetitive prayers or dissociative mediation.  EMOTIONAL RECOVERY in itself is simpler—but much harder. Our solution is to resolve the traumas buried in our unconscious...

EMOTIONAL EMANCIPATION. FREEDOM FROM Childhood  FEARs.Love as a punishment Rejecting the love auction.  The program has been born out of the ten stage course that became such an unqualified success in 2016.The freedom, liberation of the child within gave way to our questioning child within. The Child Within says OK so I get the course but I have been reborn into often the same circumstances this is at times almost unbearably painful as I am attempting recovery using the same emotional palate and people around me are still reacting in a highly dysfunctional manner now I feel alienated within my own species.I feel well but isolated. The program brings a range of answers to our alienation of illusory love.